Divorces among Americans over the age of 50, often referred to as “gray divorces,” now account for approximately 36% of all divorces in the United States (1).
For many older couples, what’s at stake in a separation can be decades of retirement planning, home equity and shared financial history.
Take Betsy Goldstein. When she began divorce proceedings at age 53, she faced years of taxes, retirement accounts and homeownership red tape. “I really needed someone to hold my hand,” she told Bloomberg (2).
But it’s not just about dividing assets; it’s about building a solid foundation for the rest of your life.
Many factors contribute to so-called gray divorces. And it’s not just an emotional shock; The financial devastation caused by divorce during this phase of life can have a huge impact.
In Goldstein’s case, she got help from a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst, or CDFA. CDFA helped her set budgets, map expenses, and create a plan she could follow. Goldstein had never had to navigate alone before, so bringing in a specialist helped. Five years later, she is still a customer.
Stories like Goldstein’s and the fact that the divorce rate among people 50 and older has roughly doubled since the 1990s help explain why the number of CDFAs has jumped about 40% in the United States over the past decade, to about 3,500 (3, 4).
Research shows how a late separation can impact household finances, particularly for women. An analysis of “gray divorce” found that after a breakup at age 50 or older, women’s living standards drop by about 45%, while men’s experience a decline of about 21%. And unlike young divorcees, many older people may never fully recover financially, especially if they do not remarry (5).
If one spouse takes time away from full-time work to raise children or care for family, that time off work means less money for retirement and lower Social Security payments. So, when the house and pension are divided, the lowest income is often the one who has difficulty rebuilding. (6)
Read more: The average American net worth stands at a surprising $620,654. But that means almost nothing. Here’s the number that matters (and how to make it skyrocket)
If you are over 50 and divorce is imminent, there are some financial steps you can take to protect yourself.
To protect yourself and your assets, you need a complete picture of your finances. Get a complete view of joint and individual accounts, including bank accounts, retirement accounts, pensions, property titles, insurance policies and beneficiary designations. And be sure to list all debts (7).
Open separate checking or savings accounts, get a credit card if you don’t have one, make sure you understand how to connect to all online statements, and build a small emergency fund. These are crucial steps toward independence and building credit.
Retirement accounts, pensions and annuities can make up the bulk of your joint assets, but misdistribution can result in taxes, lost income or other long-term consequences. If you can, consider different scenarios (like keeping the house, splitting accounts, selling, and reinvesting) and think about how much income you’ll need in the future (8).
If you were married for at least 10 years, you may be eligible for Social Security based on your ex-spouse’s income rather than your own (9). This may be especially important if you have limited work history or contributions.
Making a request on an ex-spouse’s file does not reduce their benefits. Your service is independent, you therefore do not “take” them; their profits remain intact. For many gray divorcees, spousal benefits can mean the difference between barely surviving and having a stable retirement income (10).
Many people view the family home as a safe and comforting anchor after a divorce. But owning and maintaining a home yourself, with taxes, maintenance, utilities and insurance, can be expensive. It may be worth considering renting or downsizing.
A divorce at age 50 or over is not just a one-off separation. It can reshape decades of financial planning. Create a new budget, build a retirement-ready savings plan, and make informed decisions about insurance, healthcare, and long-term living expenses.
A savvy divorce financial planner can make a huge difference. They can model different scenarios, explain long-term impacts and help you make informed choices.
Gray divorce has serious financial consequences, especially if you have never managed your finances yourself. If you are over 50, whether married or divorced, it is a good idea to start clarifying your family finances, developing your independence and planning for your retirement. The sooner you take matters into your own hands, the better positioned you will be if life throws you a curveball.
Article sources
We rely only on verified sources and credible third-party reports. For more details, see our ethics and editorial guidelines.
National Library of Medicine (1); Bloomberg (2, 4); Pew Research Center (3); The Journals of Gerontology Series B (5); Los Angeles Times (6); Kiplinger (7); American Bank (8); ASS(9); Financial Planning Association (10)
This article provides information only and should not be considered advice. It is provided without warranty of any kind.
